I can't believe that Christmas is this Saturday! What happened to 2010? I feel very underprepared for the holidays this year. Typically, I don't do much shopping until I make it back to Michigan to visit my family. This year is no different, but I would normally already be back in the states at this time, and I don't actually fly out until the 21st this year. I guess I'll be part of the mad dash to buy presents at the last minute. Really, though, I can't get terribly worked up about the commercial aspects of Christmas, because that's not really what it's supposed to be about.
Last year was not a good Christmas for me. E and I were going through a really rough period relationship-wise. We chose to drive to MI, which is a pretty stressful 2 day trip no matter what the circumstances are. The trip was ok, mostly because E and I never really stopped being best friends regardless of what was going on with our romantic relationship. The family part of Christmas, however, was TERRIBLE. How do you answer questions about your life when you are unhappy and unsure about the future?
Without spilling a bunch of relationship details that aren't completely mine to divulge, E and I obviously worked things out. Frankly, E has always known what he doesn't want in life. I spent the first 7 years of our relationship hoping that he would change his mind and want the things that I want. It took me about 6 months of turmoil before I realized that I couldn't be happy without E, regardless of the finer distinctions of our relationship. And now, I am happy not because I've gotten what I want, but because I want what I have. Not to mention that I am also thankful for all the good things in my life other than E.
This Christmas promises to be much better than the last.
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